Smosh has officially killed laughter

For all of Youtube's accomplishments, it will be remembered in future generations for being the medium that gave fame and power to those who killed all joy. When we all live in a grey, bleak world, full of sadness and hate, we will know that those who killed all humour in the world were able to do so because youtube allowed them to.

Now, I fail to see what about this video is funny. Is their horrible-on-purpose acting supposed to be funny? The mix-up with the roses and the dog shitting? Was I supposed to laugh at the whole hypnotizing thing?

It all sounds like the lame set-up to a marginally entertaining comedy sketch that redeems itself with the punchline, only here, instead of a punchline we get the death of all happiness

When looking at things like these, I liketo ponder on the nature of humour. What makes something funny? If you ask me, humor can be broken down into several factors

a) The surprising. Whn you dont see something coming, when its unpredictable, the reult can be, and often is, humorous. That's why a joke you've heard before isnt funny.

b) The shocking or offensive. When something offends sensibilities, be they personal or collectively held, it becomes subversive and therefore acquires a quality of humour.

c) That which is right. Jokes work by targeting the deceitful and the self-righteous, by working with the audiences properly-directed outrage and scorn. Speaking truth to power, calling people on their bullshit, and relating on a level of opinion or understanding with those you're supposed to entertain. This is why satire works so well, why Voltaire and Twain and O'rourke are still read and still laughed at, because they were insulting, yes, but because they were insulting that which needed to be insulted. It's why Chris Rock, Richard Pryor and George Carlin work so damn well, and its the legacy we owe to Lenny Bruce.

d) That which is clever. This is the principal element; without this, surprising is just surprising, being right is just stating the facts, and being offensive is just being rude. If you are not clever, you are not funny, and that is that.

Notice how smosh tries to hit  the above notes, and fails miserably at every one. Their excuse for cleverness is a tired, old gag that involves the most overused comedic device ever; the misheard conversation. Their attempts at being offensive or shocking involve dog shit, which hasnt offended anyone since... well... since we first saw a dog shitting. And of course, they cant be right about anything, they dont have a message. Its as if they ransacked the garbage can outside of NBC studios for rejected SN sketch ideas, and tied them all together with a plot that is beyond nonsensical.

And yet, they're huge fucking celebrities! TAM, Britanic, Derrick, Magic Hugs, Picnicface and countless others with genuine, plentiful talent sit on the shelf in youtube, but fucking SMOSH gets millions of views. This is why I hate the internet

It embarasses me to part of the same species as Jeff Dunham

Jeff dunham is not funny. Now, I want to make clear that I am not offended by dunham's racially charged puppets and homphobic jokes. Ok, that's a lie, Dunham's very existence offends me, not because his jokes are offensive, but because watching him is like watching everything that is good about stand-up comedy anally raped by some dude who feigns innocence while he voices a puppet who yells " Squeal like a pig!" deliverance-style.

You see, once upon a time, before Carlos Mencia killed offensive comedy, saying something horrifyingly racist or misogynist added to the humour of a joke, because you knew there would be people who would get pissed off about it. Its what makes 4chan and Encyclopaedia Dramatica funny, in a tragic sort of way. Dunham tries to pull this off, but fails epically for two reasons:

1. Dunham is completely innofensive. No one will write an angry letter to comedy central demanding that Jeff Dunham be pulled off the air. He could walk onstage and read The protocols of Elder Zion and the anti-defamation league would laugh out loud, or at least the old, unbearably boring ones. Regardless of what he says or does, Dunhamn, and his puppets, are incapable of offending anyone.

2. Shock Humour requires actual humour, not just shock. If you want to use offensive material to make a joke funnier, that's fine, but you still need to have a joke. The same way that Michael richards screaming " NIGGER! NIGGER!" at the top of his lungs isnt funny, a puppet claiming that a gay superhero's ass whistles when he flys isnt funny, and its not even that offensive.

HAHAHA, GET IT? CAUSE HE TAKES IT IN THE ASS, AND THAT'S FUNNY!

If you think that's funny, I have some dissapointing news for you; middle school is going to suck next year.

See, an insulting joke has to be both funny and insulting, if its not funny, its just an insult. And simple insults are not funny, regardless of how stoned you are. Seriously, go to a mirror and scream every racial slur you know as loud as you can. Did you laugh? if so, you'll find dunham hilarious. You'll also find it impossible to count to 10 out loud without bursting into laughter. The good news? you're easily entertained and thus probably happy. The bad news? you're worthless as a human being, and your mother is ashamed of you.

So to recap:

Funny and insulting

Proof that god hates us

HAHAHA, GET IT? CAUSE BLACK PEOPLE DONT WATCH HOCKEY OR NASCAR!!

Seriously, even I can admit to (almost) chuckling once or twice during Carlos Mencia's stand-up, you know, when he tells the jokes he's stolen from better comedians. But there is nothing in dunham's repertoire of "jokes" that can even be mistaken as comedy,and yet millions of people watch him and giggle like stoned schoolgirls.

This guy has inherited the title  of "America's favourite comedian" from the likes of Larry the Cable Guy and Dane Cook. The sad part is that the late- 80's early 90's comedy scene, with Andrew Dice Clay and Carrot top, will be seen in the future as a high point in comedy compared to 2005 and on, with the likes of Dane Cook, Carlos Mencia Jeff Dunham and... Carrot Top.